Today was D Day, the day for egg retrieval. Waking up this morning was kind of surreal. I had no idea what to expect, like how I was going to feel or how many eggs where developed.
We made that long drive to Seoul and went to the procedure area. I was sent back right away to change and I had the coolest looking gown. Since I'm in Asia the gown looked like a Geisha type dress, I so wish I took a picture! Ok back to the procedure, well when I was sent back I was told to lay on a table and was given a shot and next thing i know I wake up and everything was done. That whole process from arriving and being sent back and put to sleep literally took 20mins. I'm thinking Damn these Korean work fast!
After I woke up I laid there for a few and was asked if I felt dizzy, well at the time I didn't so I was told I can get up. Lets just say that didn't go to well because I nearly fell to the ground and had to be assisted to a couch to lay down. I laid there for a good 20mins and asked again if I was ok and again I felt ok. Still a no go and I became pale and was taken back to the recovery room and had an IV placed back it because I didn't take to well to the anesthesia. After a good hour after the procedure I was able to stand and walk to where my husband was. Over all everything went well, the only down fall was they only could collect 5 eggs. Let all hope all 5 are good and become 5 strong embryos, so when Saturday comes I am able to have 3 embryos placed!
Feb 10, 2011
Feb 7, 2011
Let the count down begin!
OK lets try to write a blog with no grammatical errors, but it might be hard to do since some people think because I am Hispanic I can't speak proper English! ;)
SUPER DUPER EXCITED!!! We were given the go ahead for egg retrieval!! Yes, this is where you all scream!!!!!!!!!!! I bet you are wondering when the day is, well the date is set for this Wednesday the 9th.
When the doctor said the words "we can retrieve the eggs", I completely went blank. I am thinking to myself WOW THIS IS HAPPENING! Now at this point so many thoughts are running through my head and the main thing was, Am I ready?. We all know that I would not be doing this if I was not but everything was happening so fast, it all happened at once and I didn't have time to catch up. Ready or not it is going down!
Finally after all was scheduled I was sent to counseling to discuss the process of the procedure and was given loads of medicine. I was informed when to take and how to take. In the back of my mind I was jumping for joy thinking no more shots!
So let the count down begin! Only
SUPER DUPER EXCITED!!! We were given the go ahead for egg retrieval!! Yes, this is where you all scream!!!!!!!!!!! I bet you are wondering when the day is, well the date is set for this Wednesday the 9th.
When the doctor said the words "we can retrieve the eggs", I completely went blank. I am thinking to myself WOW THIS IS HAPPENING! Now at this point so many thoughts are running through my head and the main thing was, Am I ready?. We all know that I would not be doing this if I was not but everything was happening so fast, it all happened at once and I didn't have time to catch up. Ready or not it is going down!
Finally after all was scheduled I was sent to counseling to discuss the process of the procedure and was given loads of medicine. I was informed when to take and how to take. In the back of my mind I was jumping for joy thinking no more shots!
So let the count down begin! Only
| 1 | day | |
| 33 | hours | |
| 2000 | minutes |
Feb 6, 2011
Slow down there Forrest, I need to catch up!
So I notice that I kind of negleted my blog this week but this whole IVF process is happening so fast that I cant seem to keep up.
I have gone to the doctors twice since my last post and the have good news then a little disappointing news.
Well in my last post I mentioned that my follicles were not growing as big as the doctor had hoped but when I went back to check again we had good news that they were growing like they should. The doctor said he wanted me to continue with the shots but added another shot called Centride to stop ovulation so that more eggs can develop before egg retrieval. I was so happy to hear that they were growing more from the last time, got kind of worried that it might not happen this month but nope things are coming along! This shot was a little scary to take since I had to mix the medicine and take the bubbles out of the syringe. Im not going to lie, it took me a good 20 mins to mix, take out the bubbles and change the needle before I could even inject it in me lol! Thank God my son was there to remind me how it was done cuz I was so nervous I would do it wrong :) Keep in mind people my husband is a Medic but was at work when all this was going down... Where is he when i really need him? lol This shot hurt a little bit and made me itch for a good hour afterwords but I would do anything to have a baby!
Today we headed down to Seoul for yet another appointment to see what the egg status was this time but were a little disappointed that they were not as big yet again as they should. So another day of shots to make things work and was told that this Thursday or Friday will be egg retrieval day. Like I said before this process is happening so fast. We might even have a great Valentines Gift!!!! I'm so excited and seriously a lot less stressed! keep your hopes up for us because this thing is happening!
I have gone to the doctors twice since my last post and the have good news then a little disappointing news.
Well in my last post I mentioned that my follicles were not growing as big as the doctor had hoped but when I went back to check again we had good news that they were growing like they should. The doctor said he wanted me to continue with the shots but added another shot called Centride to stop ovulation so that more eggs can develop before egg retrieval. I was so happy to hear that they were growing more from the last time, got kind of worried that it might not happen this month but nope things are coming along! This shot was a little scary to take since I had to mix the medicine and take the bubbles out of the syringe. Im not going to lie, it took me a good 20 mins to mix, take out the bubbles and change the needle before I could even inject it in me lol! Thank God my son was there to remind me how it was done cuz I was so nervous I would do it wrong :) Keep in mind people my husband is a Medic but was at work when all this was going down... Where is he when i really need him? lol This shot hurt a little bit and made me itch for a good hour afterwords but I would do anything to have a baby!
Today we headed down to Seoul for yet another appointment to see what the egg status was this time but were a little disappointed that they were not as big yet again as they should. So another day of shots to make things work and was told that this Thursday or Friday will be egg retrieval day. Like I said before this process is happening so fast. We might even have a great Valentines Gift!!!! I'm so excited and seriously a lot less stressed! keep your hopes up for us because this thing is happening!
Feb 1, 2011
Laugh and be sad at the same time. :) :(
Ugh more disappointing news :( well today we headed back to the doctors to see if my follicles were growing.. But before I tell you how that went I have to tell you about my experience at the Korean doctor.
Ok here it goes... So I go to my appointment and the doctor says I need blood drawn, urine test and an ekg... Well the blood work was done and then I headed over to get an EKG, I'm told to take off my shirt and bra and lay down.... Well I felt so awkward laying there with no gown fully exposed waiting for her to start.. If you never been to a Korean hospital then things are done differently! This was no ordinary ekg lol instead of the normal sticky things they had these balloon suction cups that stuck to my body and they had clamps to go on my hands... I truly tried my hardest not to laugh but this was some funny stuff and I felt like I was going to get electrocuted. ( you all know I fail and was cracking up) I wished Adrian came back to witness this event cuz he would never let me live it down.
Well finally the last stage was to have a pee test done. I'm directed to the rest room and headed in but when I opened the stall I burst out laughing even more... I kind of forgot I live in Korea but was brought back to reality when I saw what I saw..... The Asian Toilet.. If you don't know what it looks like then here is the picture lol
So I'm forced to pop a squat and pee in a cup all while holding in my laughter ( just know this will be one story to tell my kiddos when or if they arrive lol)
Ok so back to the disappointing news.. Well my follicles are not growing like the doctor hoped the would. He was hoping they were bigger then what they were and was trying to find the reason why they are not growing but couldn't find an answer. I truly hope these next couple of days of shots will kick them into over drive and grow over night so come next week we can make some babies in a dish ;)
Ok here it goes... So I go to my appointment and the doctor says I need blood drawn, urine test and an ekg... Well the blood work was done and then I headed over to get an EKG, I'm told to take off my shirt and bra and lay down.... Well I felt so awkward laying there with no gown fully exposed waiting for her to start.. If you never been to a Korean hospital then things are done differently! This was no ordinary ekg lol instead of the normal sticky things they had these balloon suction cups that stuck to my body and they had clamps to go on my hands... I truly tried my hardest not to laugh but this was some funny stuff and I felt like I was going to get electrocuted. ( you all know I fail and was cracking up) I wished Adrian came back to witness this event cuz he would never let me live it down.
Well finally the last stage was to have a pee test done. I'm directed to the rest room and headed in but when I opened the stall I burst out laughing even more... I kind of forgot I live in Korea but was brought back to reality when I saw what I saw..... The Asian Toilet.. If you don't know what it looks like then here is the picture lol
So I'm forced to pop a squat and pee in a cup all while holding in my laughter ( just know this will be one story to tell my kiddos when or if they arrive lol)
Ok so back to the disappointing news.. Well my follicles are not growing like the doctor hoped the would. He was hoping they were bigger then what they were and was trying to find the reason why they are not growing but couldn't find an answer. I truly hope these next couple of days of shots will kick them into over drive and grow over night so come next week we can make some babies in a dish ;)
Jan 28, 2011
Ding Ding Ding , Round one!
I feel like Mike Tyson going into a fight in his 1st round agaist a battle. Since this blog's title is Round one, you all know the HCG shot did not work. Yesterday was a very hard day for me to get though! I didnt want to leave the house and my face was blank. At around 12pm my lovely best friend showed up and ruined the day. I was really hoping the shot worked. I was hoping it worked for a couple of reasons, 1. Being the cost of IVF 2. The chances of having more then one child and 3. The whole IVF process. All day my husband tried to cheer me up and I just couldnt pull myself out of that slump. He said what are the chances IVF will not work? Arent its sucess rate high? I thought to myself that he maybe right, that IVF should and will work. Of course I go back to the cost of it, which is not cheap. I told him I just really wanted the HCG shot to work so we have that money to travel to places we have never been or even be able to go back home and visit since that trip alone is $4,000. If anyone really knows my husband then you know what his response was, His exact words "It's not like you paying for it anyways " (with a huge smile on his face) think that was him still trying to cheer me up. lol Then I start thinking of the whole IVF process... Im going to have to give myself a shot every day and the whole egg retreval and then putting it back in... just the thought of them shoving something up my (every one knows what I call my VaJay jay) privacy. lol ...Yes, I know something will be coming out of it but that im ok with ;) Woosa is what I say to myself, im getting worked up over nothing. Husband in my ear saying all will be ok.... Damn it I just want my Mommy!!!
After Im all calm (which took a day to do ;) ) I make the long journey to Seoul on the train but this time my battle buddy was My 7 year old. He did surprisingly well! When I got to the doctors I was not sure what was all going to go down, so I didn't know what to expect. My name gets called and the doctors sends me to get an ultrasound to check my follicles. I'm thinking to myself "damn how many times they gonna check" lol. After that's all done I head back to see what the results were and to my knowledge I thought all was good, But I was wrong :( doctors says the number of follicles were a little low and he was not expecting that himself. I know y'all thinking when she gonna a break with all this lol He then says not to worry that the meds will give us enough to use. So I get some blood work drawn then I was taught how to give myself the shots. Before she shows my how, im thinking old school, 2 small vials im going to have to mix the meds then mesaure the stuff but you all know we in the 21centurary and the nurse pulls out this pen looking thing and its already filled with the correct amount of dose for each day and all i got to do is pull it back and stick it in my stomach and push and bamn im good to go. What a relief uh? All that crying and worring for nothing lol
So 4 days of this shot then back to the doctors to check egg development. Keep those finger crossed guys cuz this BETTER work ;)
After Im all calm (which took a day to do ;) ) I make the long journey to Seoul on the train but this time my battle buddy was My 7 year old. He did surprisingly well! When I got to the doctors I was not sure what was all going to go down, so I didn't know what to expect. My name gets called and the doctors sends me to get an ultrasound to check my follicles. I'm thinking to myself "damn how many times they gonna check" lol. After that's all done I head back to see what the results were and to my knowledge I thought all was good, But I was wrong :( doctors says the number of follicles were a little low and he was not expecting that himself. I know y'all thinking when she gonna a break with all this lol He then says not to worry that the meds will give us enough to use. So I get some blood work drawn then I was taught how to give myself the shots. Before she shows my how, im thinking old school, 2 small vials im going to have to mix the meds then mesaure the stuff but you all know we in the 21centurary and the nurse pulls out this pen looking thing and its already filled with the correct amount of dose for each day and all i got to do is pull it back and stick it in my stomach and push and bamn im good to go. What a relief uh? All that crying and worring for nothing lol
So 4 days of this shot then back to the doctors to check egg development. Keep those finger crossed guys cuz this BETTER work ;)
Jan 22, 2011
Still Waiting :/
Tick tick tick time is still ticking away as we wait for my new cyle to start or if it's going to start. I sit here and think if it will come then the ivf process starts and that is when I will be truly nervous!
This morning I asked my husband if we should by a pregnancy test and his reply is why.. I look at him and say to see if I am, he goes to say a pregnancy test is taken if you miss you period lol I think that's his words for saying don't jump the gun cuz we might not like what we see. Which he is right lol we should just wait and see.... Ugggggg but who likes to wait lol
At times I wish my family was close by for times like this. Pretty soon I will be going to the doc a lot and I know I can go alone but the doctors office is 1 1/2 hours away and I go alone :( sometimes I Need my mommy to hold my hand and say things will work out. Most know I'm not into religion or believe in the bible but at times I like to hear my mother and sisters pray for me :) so guys keep pray for us! And let this week fly by!!!!!!!
This morning I asked my husband if we should by a pregnancy test and his reply is why.. I look at him and say to see if I am, he goes to say a pregnancy test is taken if you miss you period lol I think that's his words for saying don't jump the gun cuz we might not like what we see. Which he is right lol we should just wait and see.... Ugggggg but who likes to wait lol
At times I wish my family was close by for times like this. Pretty soon I will be going to the doc a lot and I know I can go alone but the doctors office is 1 1/2 hours away and I go alone :( sometimes I Need my mommy to hold my hand and say things will work out. Most know I'm not into religion or believe in the bible but at times I like to hear my mother and sisters pray for me :) so guys keep pray for us! And let this week fly by!!!!!!!
Jan 17, 2011
The Waiting Place
The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.
~Dr. Seuss~
Oh how I hate waiting, time just seems to take WAY longer then it normally does! So as the time just ticks away to see if the HCG shot did the trick, I am enjoying the time with my Husband and son. To me my husband and I have grown stronger in our marriage. I think the tension of wanting a baby has died down since questions are being answered and we are moving along in the process of having our family grow. We seem to joke about having triplets and what will we do being on the other side of the world away from family. How would we not go crazy having 3 babies at the same time? How will we even go anywhere as a family in our small Korean car? (might just have to take 2 trips lol) I think in our heads (If we have to do IVF) we are preparing ourselves for 3, since we plan to get 3 embryos placed.
Today we took a trip to Mcdonalds (which is a 30 min drive up and down a mountain mind you) and Homeplus for a little adventure. While browsing through the isle my husband stumbles across a blanket, He points it out and said look a baby blanket we should get it. Then you see me coming down the isle to see what this blanket looks like and low and behold it is a Simpson's blanket with Maggie on it. I looked and laughed cuz of the design but since he pointed it out and wanted to get it, we now have a baby blanket (just in case our turn out is a good one, which in my heart will be) with little Maggie Simpson on it! Good find Adrian!
To us its best to have these thought in our heads! Good to think positive! So all think positive with us, we need all the good hopes and wishes to make this thing happen!
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.
~Dr. Seuss~
Oh how I hate waiting, time just seems to take WAY longer then it normally does! So as the time just ticks away to see if the HCG shot did the trick, I am enjoying the time with my Husband and son. To me my husband and I have grown stronger in our marriage. I think the tension of wanting a baby has died down since questions are being answered and we are moving along in the process of having our family grow. We seem to joke about having triplets and what will we do being on the other side of the world away from family. How would we not go crazy having 3 babies at the same time? How will we even go anywhere as a family in our small Korean car? (might just have to take 2 trips lol) I think in our heads (If we have to do IVF) we are preparing ourselves for 3, since we plan to get 3 embryos placed.
Today we took a trip to Mcdonalds (which is a 30 min drive up and down a mountain mind you) and Homeplus for a little adventure. While browsing through the isle my husband stumbles across a blanket, He points it out and said look a baby blanket we should get it. Then you see me coming down the isle to see what this blanket looks like and low and behold it is a Simpson's blanket with Maggie on it. I looked and laughed cuz of the design but since he pointed it out and wanted to get it, we now have a baby blanket (just in case our turn out is a good one, which in my heart will be) with little Maggie Simpson on it! Good find Adrian!
To us its best to have these thought in our heads! Good to think positive! So all think positive with us, we need all the good hopes and wishes to make this thing happen!
Jan 14, 2011
Short and sweet!
Ok so I know it's been a while since I have posted a blog, it's just been that I haven't gone back to the doctors nor have I been focused lately.. I guess I'm trying to keep myself busy and not stress over not having a baby!
So now I'm back and I went to the doctor yesterday, I had an ultrasound to check to see how my follicles are developing during ovulation. The doctor said all looks normal. He then suggested I be given an HCG trigger shot to induce ovulation. Of course I got the shot! I am really hoping this might do the trick, if not then next step is IVF. If some of you are unfamiliar with the HCG shot, it's a shot that makes you ovulate. But here is the catch, in order for it to work (like when sperm meets egg) you have to time it perfectly. So I am ordered to (get it on) tonight since I have a short window.
With that said everyone please cross your fingers and toes that this works for us!!!!
So now I'm back and I went to the doctor yesterday, I had an ultrasound to check to see how my follicles are developing during ovulation. The doctor said all looks normal. He then suggested I be given an HCG trigger shot to induce ovulation. Of course I got the shot! I am really hoping this might do the trick, if not then next step is IVF. If some of you are unfamiliar with the HCG shot, it's a shot that makes you ovulate. But here is the catch, in order for it to work (like when sperm meets egg) you have to time it perfectly. So I am ordered to (get it on) tonight since I have a short window.
With that said everyone please cross your fingers and toes that this works for us!!!!
Jan 8, 2011
Holy Batman that Hurt!
Continued from my last blog.... Well I was called back into this little room to be told to changed into this lil skirt typed dress so they can do the exam. It was the funniest looking thing but it's the norm for Koreans to put on this lil drape :) As I lay on the table I'm told to relax, what are these people thinking when they tell a patient to relax? How can I possible relax when your about to shove something in me lol well I did the best I could.
She started with the procedure and things were going good until she started injecting the dye. At first it was not to bad, but just a moment later I get this extream pain and I screamed. I felt so bad for the people waiting out of the room since they were going to be next and hear my screams of pain, they must have been so scared! I'm thinking in my head this didn't hurt like this the 1st time I had this done, something must me wrong. The nurse helps me calm down and starts asking me question. You all know when a nurse asks you questions that means something is up. Well this procedure only took 5 mins but felt like a life time. My husband was there with me but waited outside, of course the second he sees me he says I'm a chicken and that I can't take pain. I'm thinking in my head (boy is you serious you were not just going through that lol) men I tell you.
So we head back upstairs to get the results. As we sit and wait I kept thinking I wonder what was wrong, why was this time different? Then my names gets called and my husband and I sit down at this big desk for the results. The doctors crosses his hand and I'm thinking oh damn what now. He first starts with the good findings of my right tubes and says alls good on this side but goes to say my left tube is completely blocked! No wonder why I was in such pain lol the dye was being forced in something that was blocked. Since the doctor is so nice he says no worries we can still have babies, just might need a little help. To me I was somewhat relieved to find that there is a problem, no we know what's wrong! Next week I go back to check my ovulation and see if all is still working on the other side and to discuss our plan. My head is held high and I know we will be successful!
She started with the procedure and things were going good until she started injecting the dye. At first it was not to bad, but just a moment later I get this extream pain and I screamed. I felt so bad for the people waiting out of the room since they were going to be next and hear my screams of pain, they must have been so scared! I'm thinking in my head this didn't hurt like this the 1st time I had this done, something must me wrong. The nurse helps me calm down and starts asking me question. You all know when a nurse asks you questions that means something is up. Well this procedure only took 5 mins but felt like a life time. My husband was there with me but waited outside, of course the second he sees me he says I'm a chicken and that I can't take pain. I'm thinking in my head (boy is you serious you were not just going through that lol) men I tell you.
So we head back upstairs to get the results. As we sit and wait I kept thinking I wonder what was wrong, why was this time different? Then my names gets called and my husband and I sit down at this big desk for the results. The doctors crosses his hand and I'm thinking oh damn what now. He first starts with the good findings of my right tubes and says alls good on this side but goes to say my left tube is completely blocked! No wonder why I was in such pain lol the dye was being forced in something that was blocked. Since the doctor is so nice he says no worries we can still have babies, just might need a little help. To me I was somewhat relieved to find that there is a problem, no we know what's wrong! Next week I go back to check my ovulation and see if all is still working on the other side and to discuss our plan. My head is held high and I know we will be successful!
Jan 7, 2011
Test test and more test!!!
So today I am getting a test done called hysterosalpingogography ( or HSG). This is the 2nd time I have taken this test. My first time was in November of 2009 and then the test came back normal. Doctors then were uncertain what was wrong with me so they suggested I be put on the fertility med called clomid. For those who are unfamiliar with clomid, it is a drug to help make you ovulate. Well let's just say this drung didn't work lol.
I was getting more and more restless with the doctors for no explination as to my infertility at the time, so I decided to seek a doctor who specializes in infertility. Well I am glad I did since the doctor found out I had endomitriosis. Endomitriosis causes you to have absest and lesions in you uterus and tubes. When I found this out I was not worried at all or even in shocked due to this runs I'm my family. I knew this could be fixed so I under went a laproscopy to correct it. Well this was in may of 2010 and still no baby, which only makes this much harder since questions were not being answered.
As some might know I married a soldier which cause us to travel places we would not go to otherwise. Well guess where we end up, south Korea! Here I was so worried having a baby will not happen for sometime since I did not know the medical benifits. Well I was wrong! Here they have a well known fertility hospital called Cha hospital and they have nothing but great out comes. Of course I was quickly refered and that's where I am as I type. I'm patiently waiting to have this test done! I am so nervous as to what the out come might be after my sugery.
Well they are calling me back so let's see how this goes!!!!
I was getting more and more restless with the doctors for no explination as to my infertility at the time, so I decided to seek a doctor who specializes in infertility. Well I am glad I did since the doctor found out I had endomitriosis. Endomitriosis causes you to have absest and lesions in you uterus and tubes. When I found this out I was not worried at all or even in shocked due to this runs I'm my family. I knew this could be fixed so I under went a laproscopy to correct it. Well this was in may of 2010 and still no baby, which only makes this much harder since questions were not being answered.
As some might know I married a soldier which cause us to travel places we would not go to otherwise. Well guess where we end up, south Korea! Here I was so worried having a baby will not happen for sometime since I did not know the medical benifits. Well I was wrong! Here they have a well known fertility hospital called Cha hospital and they have nothing but great out comes. Of course I was quickly refered and that's where I am as I type. I'm patiently waiting to have this test done! I am so nervous as to what the out come might be after my sugery.
Well they are calling me back so let's see how this goes!!!!
Jan 6, 2011
How it All Begins!
As you can see from the title of my blog that this is a journey to motherhood for the second time, so let me fill you in on the 1st time. I first became a mother at the age of 18; though I was young I was ready for the action. Growing up I knew I was dentin for motherhood, destine to love, destine to nurture and destine to care for a child whether this child was mine or not! Might sound weird but I knew I wanted to be a mother of many children (almost like the old lady that lived in a shoe) ;) When I found out I was pregnant at 18 I was scared, guess you can say extremely scared. Many questions ran though my mind, Was I able to care for this child at a young age? Was I able to provide for this child? Main question was, Was I ready to be a mother? After all those questions were answered (by me of course) I knew I was determined to be an amazing mother to this child.
On July 25 2003 that day came. The day to be a mother to the most handsome little boy and Boy was it a rough start. I was this child’s main care giver, as my son’s biological father really was not much of a help. Sacrifice was my middle name! I pushed school aside to make sure I was the one to provide him. Moved out on my own to prove to the world I was ready. Yes, though I had a rough time being a mother at a young age I still wanted to be like the Old lady we talked about earlier, but wouldn’t allow myself to struggle to be a mommy or be selfish to my son, Nor did I have a man in my life to even have more babies ;) 5 years of being the mother and father to this child I finally met the most amazing man. Not only did this man love me, he loved this child I came with. Oh how I knew this was the man I would live in the shoe with! :) Sure enough not only was he great, he wanted the same things I wanted, but his version was ( I want a football team). Some might say these people are crazy but who cares we know what we can handle.
Or course you all know I married that man! But remember this is the journey to the 2nd time around. Well let’s just say the 2nd time around is WAY HARDER than the 1st time. This is the classic case when you want something you can’t have it, which is a bummer! I’m 26 years old and dealing with secondary infertility. We have gone through the phase of (is it you? is it me?). Well it’s me and boy has it taken a toll on me, wondering if I womanly enough. I ask the questions, Why now? Why when I’m ready, Why when I can provide and not struggle cant I be a mommy again. People say just wait, things will happen when the time is right. Um Hello? The time is now People!
Over the time of my blog I will talk about the struggles of going to the doctors and all the findings they have and might find. I hope maybe, over time this may be useful to someone going through the same thing. I will try my best not to cry when writing this blog but at times it may be hard since I long to be a mommy again so badly! I also will be open to questions and comments so keep them coming! ;) Keep in mind I’m not a writer so commas may not be in the right place, wording maybe off so bare with me. ;)
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